So you’ve landed a date with a lovely someone. You’re feeling pumped and confident – until suddenly, the nerves kick in. After all, if the first date doesn’t go well, there won’t be a second one.
For many men, dating over 40 can seem intimidating, especially if you’ve been out of the dating scene for a while. First dates are even more nerve-wracking, and for good reason.
No matter how experienced you think you are, it’s important for men over 40 to be prepared before going on any first date. Want to make a great impression? Keep reading for 15 first date tips sure to impress her.
1. Dress well
The first thing your date will see when you arrive is the clothes you’re wearing. You want to dress well, of course, but don’t overdo it. It’s important to be authentic and show who you really are. (If you don’t normally wear suits, don’t show up in one!)
Your clothes should fit well and be well maintained, so keep an eye out for details like stains, scuffed shoes, or frayed hems.
2. Smell good
Research shows that women find men more attractive when they smell good. Not exactly surprising, is it? Shower before your date, brush your teeth, and test your breath to ensure it smells nice. Then, spray just enough cologne to give you a subtle but not overpowering scent.
3. Take charge of the logistics
In terms of where the date is taking place, the ball is often in your court. You’ll make a better impression if you do most of the planning as it shows your ability to take charge and organize. However, be sure to ask her preferences and ensure that she will enjoy the place you have chosen.
4. Keep it short
The main point of the first date is to see if you and the other person are a potential match. That’s why short dates are always best. Meeting for about an hour allows you to get to know each other, while avoiding awkward moments if you run out of things to talk about.
Don’t let everything out on the first date — you’ll want to retain some mystery to keep her wanting more.
5. Show up on time
Showing up to the date late will have your date feeling totally turned-off. It shows a lack of interest and effort. Unless there’s a valid reason, she isn’t likely to continue dating somebody who wastes her time. Plan accordingly and allow plenty of time to get to your destination.
6. Compliment her
Everyone loves a good compliment. Chances are, your date spent a considerable amount of time getting ready. Complimenting her on her hair, outfit, or just letting her know you find her beautiful goes a long way in making your date feel attractive and comfortable around you.
7. Pay for the date
Always assume you’ll be the one to pay for the first date. This shows chivalry and kindness toward your date. However, you don’t need to spend more than $20 or so. Keep it simple by sticking to coffee or a drink, and don’t fight it if she appreciates the offer but insists on paying for herself.
8. Be a good conversationalist
Your date is probably just as nervous as you are, and she’s likely racking her brain to come up with things to say. Keep things flowing by showing off your conversation skills.
Engage her in the conversation without talking too much about yourself. Showing her you value her opinion, asking questions and making insightful comments tells her that you are interested and makes her all the more interested in you.
9. Keep it positive
Conversation on the first date should be light, playful and airy. You don’t know this person yet and they don’t know you, which means you may give them the wrong impression if all you do is complain about work for a whole hour.
Start the conversation off with some light humor and focus on getting to know each other in a positive and lighthearted tone.
10. Be chill and avoid eager behavior
Although you might be excited to see how things progress with this person, remember to maintain a calm and cool composure without seeming needy or too eager to get things moving faster.
Don’t rush anything and treat the date as if you were going out with any other friend without strong expectations for where you want it to lead. Go with the flow and let things pan out naturally.
11. Be aware of body language
Your date can likely pick up on whether or not you are bored or disinterested simply by the way you portray yourself. While on your date, good posture and an engaged facial expression is key.
Sitting with your shoulders slumped or your arms crossed is bad body language to your date. Instead, show interest by leaning forward, nodding and smiling frequently.
12. Stay off your phone
The last thing anybody wants is to be on a date with someone with their eyes glued to their phone screen. Give your date your full attention by putting your phone on silent so you can enjoy an uninterrupted conversation.
13. Treat staff well
Your date will be looking to see the way you interact with servers and staff. Someone who complains about small things or who is rude and condescending to waitstaff is a huge turn-off. Treating others well shows your date that you are kind, mature and well-mannered.
14. Don’t drink too much
While on your date, you and the other person may decide to have a few alcoholic drinks together. At least for the first date, you should always keep drinking to a minimum. The last thing you want to do is embarrass yourself if you end up becoming intoxicated. A drink or two is fine, but don’t over-do it.
15. Follow up after the date
At the end of the date, you should both have some idea whether or not you want to keep things moving forward. If there’s mutual interest, follow up the next day with a call or text. Contrary to popular belief, keeping her waiting won’t make her like you more. Instead, her excitement might wear off – especially if she’s got other dates lined up.
Make a great impression
First dates don’t have to be awkward or anxiety-ridden. Following these first date tips will ensure that you make a great impression.
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